


Back to Normal

by jello_brain



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, short domination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-05
Updated: 2014-11-05
Packaged: 2018-02-24 05:23:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2569712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jello_brain/pseuds/jello_brain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a particularly bad Monica-esque episode, Mickey finally surrendered to Fiona's and Lip's nagging and blaming and had Ian admitted.<br/>Now back home Ian sees Mickey still struggling.<br/>He trys to make it right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back to Normal

It had been a turbulent time for Ian and Mickey since Ian's first crash.  
For a long time he could not, would not admit that he had a problem.  
But after a particularly bad Monica-esque episode, Mickey finally surrendered to Fiona's and Lip's nagging and blaming and had Ian admitted. Of course Ian had fought him tooth and nail, had cried and pleaded with him, coursed him. But this time Mickey had not backed down.  
He held his head up, shoulders set, fighting to stay firm, his façade the only thing holding him up while everything inside shattered.

He would probably never forget Mickey's face. It had been stern, with a set jaw, unrelenting. Reminiscent of the old Mickey, before he broke free, if it hadn't been for his eyes. Alight with tears and a pain that Ian had never before seen. Almost more devastating than that moment on the couch…

Only in the quiet moments lying in the dark next to him he allowed himself to remember.  
He felt Mickey gently stroking his temple. Lovingly kneading his scalp, past his brow to his jaw, his hand came to rest on the side of his neck under his ear, just enjoying the warmth pooling between them.  
But Ian feigned sleep, because Mickey had never done this when he was awake, he only did this when he thought Ian was fast asleep.  
Ian knew this because he had woken up a few times in the middle of the night melting into the touch only to have it taken away as Mickey tried to hide it.  
And it would have been lovely had it not been for the slight hitches in Mickey's breath that were testimony to what was really going on.  
Last time Ian had managed to carefully peek out through his lashes to see Mickey's face distraught and pained.  
Ian wasn't a 100% sure about what Mickey was thinking, but he had a good idea.

A few days ago he heard Mickey talk to Mandy in her room. Ian had been napping and was on his way to the kitchen for something to drink when their voices wafted towards him:

"…s great. Especially coming from you!" Mandy had sounded pretty pissed.  
"What was that?"  
"You think you can tell me what to do and how to deal with my relationship, when you're moping around the house all day fucking sleep walking and you won't even talk to him?!"  
"The fuck you're on about! Don't you dare compare me and Ian to that piece of shit! I said I want him gone! But since you obviously have not had enough of guys beating the living shit out'a you, someone has to do it. I won't have him around Ian. It's tough enough as is!"  
"Ian has been doing fine."  
"Yeah? Well maybe you try 'n sleep next to someone you want to keep sane while Terry No. 2 is playing fucking house with you! What if he isn't fine tomorrow, huh? What if he really slits his throat next time?! He'll be sent to the nuthouse again! For a log time! Because I couldn't keep him safe!  
I won't let him go again."  
"Mickey, I-"  
"Don't! Just get rid of him. You're not happy, nobody's fucking happy with that asshole around! You only have to tell us and we're on him. He'll be gone."  
"You don't kn-"  
"Oh, I do know! But you gotta get it through that thick scull of yours that I can't fucking sleep with worrying about how Ian's gonna wake up next, and wondering, when I'll find your face bashed in again. Deal with it! I've had it!!"

Mickey came crashing out and made his way to the bathroom not seeing Ian huddled next to the fridge. So Ian grabbed a cup of water and went back to bed hoping Mickey wouldn't hear..

\------------------

Ian worried that this was the reason Mickey couldn't sleep. Because he felt guilty, because he didn't know how to deal with having put him away into the clinic. At the time it was as if Mickey had pulled the plug on his reality. Ian had screamed and cursed.  
"You promised you wouldn't let them take me away, you promised!! I never should've come back, fucking piece of shit! Coward!"

The memories still hurt Ian deeply. The moment he had gotten better he realized what he had done and almost crashed into the next depression because he thought Mickey would not want to see him again.  
When he did come to see him Ian had apologized , but maybe it had not been enough. He had been in the clinic still.  
So with the sleeplessness, the constant drinking and Mickey being generally exhausted Ian hoped he could make it right with him.

Because Ian was right: He broke his promise. He put Ian away in a place where he couldn't protect him anymore.  
No wonder he had trouble falling asleep. But having Ian back seemed to not be enough. He still couldn't relax.  
Ever since he came home Ian had noticed. The sad looks Mickey would sometimes throw his way when he thought he wouldn't see, the gentle loving touches in the dark of night. He felt bad himself for putting Mickey through that. He wanted his tough and fierce man back.  
This had been going on for long enough. He wanted "to release him" as his therapist had said. He just hoped his plan to make Mickey happy again would work out… 

Ian had somehow managed to fall asleep after some time. Letting Mickey's touch sooth him a bit.  
Mickey had not been so lucky. He laid on his back eyes closed his face turned to Ian's head as if he'd been kissing his forehead. His breathing was too shallow, he was only resting.  
Ian pushed himself up a little from his position on Mickey's chest to reach his lips.  
Mickey was surprised and mumbled something into their kiss. Moving his lips against Mickey's he let the kiss stay lazy and sweet. Not wanting to rush things, scared of Mickey thinking he might be manic again. It seemed to work. Mickey relaxed quickly and started to push into the kiss himself, his hands finding all their favorite places, gently stroking Ian, cupping him here grabbing him there. 

Ian loved how dextrous Mickey really was.  
The two sides of his hands couldn't have been more different: Their backs and the knuckles were rough and brutal, used to pain and injury and used to inflicting them. But their insides were only ever used with precision, used to truly feel and soak up sensations. Or he used them to tell Ian to come closer into him, directing him with firm sure grips to go faster there, ease up here. Ian loved them, couldn't get enough of them on his skin.  
Moving back he brushed his nose against Mickey's , then rolled him away firmly, settling in behind him. Now he could in turn get his hands on Mickey, could move up his strong flanks, down to his hip again.  
Could smell his scent in the nape of his neck. 

Mickey reached behind his neck pulling him in pressing his back and butt right into Ian. Meanwhile Ian fished for the lube under the pillows and slathered some on himself. It wasn't easy since Mickey kept pressing close, some of it made it on Mickey's ass instead of his dick.  
He moved his hips around until he could feel his tip come up against Mickey's rim. He pushed in slowly, bathing in the breathy grunts Mickey made.  
This had always been special to him: Mickey taking him in, when he knew, that Mickey was wired to distrust anyone, to always be on the offensive, to protect himself. It had always been mind blowing. Especially now, after Ian had really screwed Mickey over with his BPD, that he would let him, even want him to. Ian needed to tell him that.

He hoped this would work because he had no other option. When he had tried to talk to Mickey he had just brushed it off and casually said he was fine.  
Changed the subject.  
So now he hoped he got his chance, got Mickey were he could neither run, nor hide his true feelings.

Enjoying the moment a little longer Ian rocked into Mickey with a bit more weight. Languidly increasing the rhythm reveling in the feeling of Mickey tightly wrapped around him already pushing back for more.  
He moved Mickey's legs under his and in moments had his arms over his head and secured.  
Right then Mickey noticed he could not move anymore.  
Ian pushed in deeply, rolling over Mickey more to immobilize his middle as well.  
"The fuck?"  
Ian saw his chance:  
"You promised me, you would take care of me."  
Mickey froze, stopped breathing.  
"Ian wh-"  
"You said we were family."  
Mickey tried to squirm away, his breathing coming in short bursts.  
"You said you would protect me. You said you wouldn't send me to some nuthouse."  
"Ian, man, come on. Lemme-"  
Ian held him tighter. Because he needed to make this hurt to make it better.. Even if it hurt himself.  
Mickey choked, and this was what he had been waiting for. Mickey tried harder to get away, he felt him clamping down on him to move, but Ian just moved with him.  
"Thank you."  
"G-huh?"  
"You said you would take care of me, and you did. You did as best and as long as you could. It must have been so hard on you. You said we're family, and I never want to feel at home anywhere else." He moved his hips again, knowing Mickey calmed down somewhat.  
"The meds are working well, I have a great support system in place. You don't have to worry now. You and I are fucking experts on this crap. You know the signs. So worry about it when it happens. You've won the war. I'm home. Start living again."  
He did it again, hearing Mickey's breathing change. He pushed in, hearing a little moan.  
"This Mick, you. You are home to me." Another thrust.  
His breath hitched, but it was a good sound.  
"You protected me as long as you could, and when you couldn't, you made sure others would. You didn't just send me to some nuthouse. You even went to Ned to take me to professionals."  
He let Mickey's hands go, but they only grabbed onto him, clutching at him.  
Moving faster now he heard Mickey enjoying it again.  
"I'm so sorry for what I said the night they dragged me away."  
Holding on to Mickey's hips again he pushed his face into his shoulder as close as it would go. Mumbling against his skin. Mickey shuddered, in turn pushing his face into the mattress shortly.  
That was why Ian rolled him over: To be close to him but to grant Mickey the dignity he deserved.  
He wanted him to just be, without judgement. Fuck, group therapy really did a number on him.  
"You're the best thing that could have happened to me, Mick. Thank you."  
"I'm so sorry-" Mickey groaned.  
"You did everything right. I can't forgive you, because there's nothing to forgive you for.  
But you need to forgive yourself."

Now they were really on the move. Pushing against each other, Mickey moved his hand back to grab the back of his neck, pulling him even closer, melting them together.  
"You're my home, Mick. So be fucking proud of it, because you did everything right!"  
His hips were now snapping forward with pounding force, really setting the pace.  
Filling the room with the sound of their bodies colliding and their barked out moans and grunts.  
That was all they were now: Only sensation. Every other feeling was being pushed out. There was no regret only the need of driving each other further.

There it was: that point they were moving towards. Desperately trying to pull the other inside of them.  
Becoming the clichéd "one", erasing any borders between them. Grabbing onto the other body roughly, squeezing, and straining. Their groans completely inarticulate. Then there was only heat and sweet pain. And then silence.

Only the aftershocks the warmth and stickiness and the lingering smaller waves of orgasm.

Slowly a high pitched tone announced the return of his hearing, his sense of smell returned as well with he scent of Mickey, their release and Ian's own sweat. Nothing was better at this moment.

When their breathing slowed they only shuffled into a more comfortable position, only to fall asleep. Both of them finally relaxed, both finally sleeping.

Later when they had showered together Mickey had hurried. He dressed quickly, pulled Ian down into a hard kiss.  
Then, with a truly evil and delighted grin he grabbed the claw hammer of the floor next to the sink and went crashing into Mandy's room.  
"Time to fuck off!!!" Ian could hear Mickey's creepy sing song along with more people suddenly moving and guns being cocked, a deep voice sounded terrified.  
"Back to normal" Ian breathed smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanwork ever. Constructive criticism welcome. Cookies for everyone.


End file.
